just move to the internet, its great here
by JeDormisToutLeTemps
Summary: There's a Vine account for the Avengers. God help us. The Avengers have an Instagram account. Abs as far as the eye can see. The Avengers have a YouTube account. There are claims that it melted brains. Those claims are true. The Avengers have a tumblr. The URL is HawkwardStark because why the fuck not. ;/; Avengers and Internet


**I sincerely apologize. Most of what you see is NOT MINE. I'm taking credit for writing this, sure, but not my ideas, not my posts, etc.**

* * *

There's a Vine account for the Avengers. God help us.

...

The first Vine is of Tony and Bruce. Well, okay, not the first Vine. The first one was of Tony promising to get as many superheroes faces as possible.

So, the second Vine is of Tony and Bruce.

The description is a simple "fund Tony's hospital bills plz".

"Parkour!" Tony shrieks, and then pushes Bruce down the rarely used stairs. Bruce hulks out. Tony runs, screaming.

...

The third Vine is of Thor and Steve sparring.

The description is "#AvengersGoHard".

It ends with Thor slamming Steve to the mat and Steve laughing before flipping them over and maneuvering his arm over Thor's windpipe.

...

The fourth is of Bucky Barnes. He finally cut his hair and he looks okay.

The description is "looking to mingle ;)".

"Oh, my interests? Well, murder, destruction, fighting off Doombots. Really, the list goes on and on!"

Many people are interested in mingling.

...

The fifth Vine is of Steve. He's dressed as Captain America, full suit and shield. Except, his feet are bare, oddly.

The description is "he's like this at home ok".

Steve walks up to Pepper Potts and tells her she is trespassing and she needs to move along. She does, and he sits in her spot right after. He gives her a regal look and she leaves with a put upon sigh.

...

The sixth is of Natasha.

The description is "acting skillz".

Her faces go from _mildly interested_ to _confused_ to _angry_ to _depressed_ to _in love_ to _happy_ to _blank_. Tony claps and she breaks into a grin malicious enough for him to back away slowly.

...

The seventh Vine is a smack cam.

The description is "HE FAILED DONT TRY AT HOME OMG".

Clint, with some weird blue goop in his hand, sneaks up behind Bruce, who's playing the piano.

His hand lands on Bruce's face and suddenly, Bruce is not Bruce. He is Hulk.

The camera thumps to the ground, and it loops over at the sound of a roar.

...

The eighth vine is of Thor, Bucky and Steve listening to dubstep, at the request of a girl in the hospital.

The description is "YAY OR NA-EH".

Thor, unsurprisingly, loves it and wants to hear more. Bucky shrugs and says, "meh." Steve's face scrunches up and the first thing to leave his mouth is an Irish prayer, warding off evil.

...

The ninth is of Thor, riding on the back of the Iron Man suit. They go to McDonalds.

There is no description.

Thor orders a Shamrock Shake and, giggling, tells Tony "DO YOU GET MY JOKE. IT IS BECAUSE FRIEND BANNER IS GREEN MUCH LIKE THIS DAIRY PRODUCT."

...

The tenth is of Steve and Natasha breaking into Bucky's room, late one night.

They have magnets. Most are pink, others have _Tony_ written on them in different fonts, and one is the official _You Just Got Saved By The Avengers!_ magnet that they gave out pretty much everywhere.

They get almost all of them on there before Bucky wakes up. The video ends with Natasha's cackle as Steve tries to disengage Bucky's arm from around his neck.

The title is "we got 53 on there tho, worth the choking".

...

The eleventh is of a battle field.

The Avengers are running away from an explosion. Clint falls. Steve goes to get him, but Natasha laughs and runs faster, Tony on her tail.

The title is "cool guys dont look at explosions. or be anywhere near them".

* * *

The Avengers have an Instagram account. Abs as far as the eye can see.

...

During the #SelfieOlympics, the Avengers submit at least 300 photos.

Clint's are mostly of him sitting on the edge of buildings, talking about his perfect balance. Natasha's are mostly her in wigs and contacts. Steve's are shirtless and he's making faces at the camera. Thor is eating during 99% of his, the last one being him in the shower, which is reported after half a million people have seen his nether regions. Tony's are of him in the suit or lab, making the suit. Bruce only puts up a few, and they're pics of him with green eyes or green hair, because he's gotten to the point where he can change certain features without Hulking out.

Bucky's are of his metal arm and his most sinister looks. Sam's are of his wings and him in the sky, looking rich and fabulous. Rhodey's are him in his suit or on the army base. Pepper's are her in the office and in the kitchen, eating greasy pizza.

...

They're nominated for the ASL ice bucket challenge, so they each get to take turns dumping ice water on each other.

For Tony, they throw ice cubes at his head and one hits him in the eye. For Steve, they pour boiling water on him, and he jumps so high he hits his head.

* * *

The Avengers have a Twitter. It's mostly rambles.

...

**TheAvengersOfficial:** _Cap and Thor arrested in #Ferguson #HandsUpDontShoot_

...

**TheAvengersOfficial:** _Bucky learned not to stick his fingers in microwave today #dumbass_

...

**TheAvengersOfficial:** _Sorry we couldn't make it to the Oscars, damn #doombots. Better luck next year, Leo!_

...

**TheAvengersOfficial:** _#SelfieOlympics r getting competitive, some of us wont talk to each other. #Hawkward_

* * *

The Avengers have a YouTube account. There are claims that it melted brains. Those claims are true.

...

"Q &amp; A with the Avengers!" was requested, obviously. Most questions were regarded with all of the sanity as a mental institution.

They're asked some scenarios and they have to answer truthfully. "Um, I wouldn't be the one with the idea to _stick it in_, okay!" Clint says for the fiftieth time.

They're asked some personal questions and they can opt out. "Hey, look, we opted out of all of them, except the ones about cooking skills, so...," Tony chuckles.

They're asked some professional questions, which they answer with actual seriousness. "When we've got people to evacuate and aliens to kill, we don't think about the surroundings, so we are very sorry about your car, but... yeah, send in proof and you'll get reimbursed."

...

"Introducing... The Avengers!" was among the first videos, and has over 11 million views.

Tony narrates, with Steve's commentary barely audible.

"So, we've got Hawkeye, or Clint, sitting in his nest as usual. Say hi, man! By the way, he accepts tips in form only. ... Oh! There's Black Widow, or Natasha, sharpening her knives. ... Yeah, ha, no jokes here. There's Thor, the big lug. Whatcha doing? ... Okay, I already know he's eating poptarts in droves. It's a wonder he's not fat, I mean, I have to buy new boxes everyday! ... Okay, whatever. Guys, this is Cap, or Steve, he's been making stupid comments the whole time. I'm surprised the fun of this conversation hasn't imploded his brain yet. ...

"This is Bucky, sometimes the Winter Soldier, though not often. He doesn't like the magnet-placer arm he has, so I like to make fun of it all of the time. ... He wouldn't dare kill me! I show him my lab space all the time, he won't give that up. This is Falcon, he goes by Sam, and he is the real McCoy, okay. He likes to pick apart our brains and put them back better than before, but he always smells like sweat, so I don't trust him. ... So what? I don't _care_ when he takes his runs! ...

"Hey! Okay! This is Bruce, don't get him angry. Oddly, no, it's not weed. Right? I thought it would be, but he says no.

"So, they you go. We're the Avengers. For those of you wondering about me, well, I don't need an introduction. Anyway..."

* * *

The Avengers have a tumblr. The URL is **HawkwardStark** because why the fuck not. Everyone follows them.

...

**Anonymous asked:** _so if u guys r the real thing, u should give proof_

**HawkwardStark** answered: [picture of Tony, Bruce and Thor in background, Clint, Natasha and Bucky in forefront, all in pajamas] _Answer enough?_

...

louheart:

sadstagram:

_YOUR BONES AND INSIDES HAVE NEVER SEEN SUNLIGHT AND THEY PROBABLY NEVER WILL_

_unless you get brutally murdered and left outside to rot_

...

ok so don't you hate it when you have somewhere to be and the devil himself appers on your face in the shape of a zit

...

there's some shit going on downtown NY, like in front of that one bank, ya know?

...

_me: *flying*_

_feels: do yoU REMEMBER THAT ONE TIME ALMOST 20 YEARS AGO BC GUESS WHAT I SURE DO AND YOU HAVE TO I MEAN IT WAS HEARTBREAKING THOSE THINGS STICK WITH YOU DO YOU REMEMBER MAN COME ON YOU REMEMEBR YOU'RE LYING IF YOU SAY YOU DON'T_

_feels: IT WAS THAT TIME THAT FRIENDS ENDED AND MONICA AND CHANDLER MOVED AWAY AND JOEY DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO AND YOU WATCHED IT LIVE AND PEOPLE SAW YOU CRYING REMEMEBER_

_feels: daMMNIT REMEMEBER_

_me: *falls out of the sky, sufferes heart attack*_

...

officialunitedstates:

stigs-mexican-cousin:

officialunitedstates:

officialunitedstates:

_what do u call spaghetti in mexico? __espagueti_

_ there is no joke here im just teaching you guys spanish_

_ yo soy mexicano y esto es correcto, felicidades usuario de tumblr officialunitedstates_

_yes and a feliz navidad to you as well_


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